Looking at my last post, it has been about a YEAR since I've given this blog any attention at all. It was not without good reason... for just as I don't like to speak simply to hear my head rattle, I definitely don't like writing that way, either.
Not sure of ever having anything to write of much substance, I chose to take time away from this venue to simply be quiet. The past year has been a "dry season" for me, but not without a good harvest of thought and process.
In a couple of weeks, it will have been a year since writing consistently in this space. Coming back to it may help me navigate where I believe I am going. If you would like to join me... I'd welcome the company.
Sunday, March 07, 2010
Saturday, March 21, 2009
Ri$k
Ever since I was a little guy I've not had much trouble being a saver. When I was given money as a gift, I typically resisted the burning in my pocket that cried out for discretionary spending. My Dad took care of that urging the day my allowance stopped when I was about 9 years old. Falling victim to the Ice Cream Man's 8-track tape's siren song yet again, I bought my last allowance funded baseball card/bubble gum packet after Dad's financial advisement was to do otherwise. Dad cut me off the family till that day and I never once again drew another dime of allowance money from his wallet. The irony now being that some of those very cards I bought then are now worth more individually than the sum total of all my allowances combined! I probably ought to sell even just one of those cards and give my Dad a really nice gift for the great lesson he taught me that day.
While I was always willing to save money for things I wanted from then on, some of that propensity for saving gave way to the lure of credit cards in later life. While I've never been held hostage by revolving credit, I have tended more toward a "buy it now, pay it off at the end of the month" mentality. That can be a little risky but to this day, barring any unforeseen circumstances, there is always satisfaction in seeing a zero balance on those accounts at the end of the month.
In more recent years, hitting mid-stride financially has afforded the opportunity at more risky financial ventures. Far, far from venture capitalist status, being able to roll just a few dollars into higher risk opportunities has been an interesting adventure. Not really a business section reader or a stock ticket watcher myself, I tend toward more spiritual interests. Consequently, I've left my higher risk investing to the hands and minds of trusted individuals who actually make their living risking other people's money. Monthly and quarterly statements have provided a thrilling kind of satisfaction in watching my money work for me. Until recent financial times... Now I watch with mouth gaping amazement and wonder if I'll ever see another "+" sign again?
Now the adage "the higher they rise, the harder they fall" seems to be the cry of the day. The higher the risk profile, apparently the deeper the subsequent losses. One advantage of being my current age is that I might have the fortunate opportunity of seeing those numbers bounce back in the next few years. For other more senior risk takers, those who ride the thrill induced side of investing, may not see "whoopee" numbers return again in their lifetime. I feel for those folks. I have thoughts of selling one of those cards to try and help one of them out... but there's not much of a market left for spectacular aged rookie cards these days either.
Risk always means the potential for loss. In the last year, the profile for my spiritual investing has been running at a relatively high clip. In my intentions to find God at deeping levels, He has led me to raise the bar in my relationships with others. In doing so, I've discovered a whole new level of risk. Any time we extend ourselves fully (or as fully as humanly possible at the time) there is risk involved. We risk giving something that may not come back, even in a lifetime or more.
Somewhere in the relationship markets of life we tend to anticipate a dollar-for-dollar return on our investments. We give "so much" to another individual and we expect "so much" (or maybe even more) in return. In some cases, we're not willing to go any deeper into our personal portfolios if we can't be sure we'll get a good return on our investment. But sometimes it just doesn't work out in a way that we get back what we give.
Tennyson once wrote, "I hold it true, whate'er befall; I feel it, when I sorrow most; 'Tis better to have loved and lost; Than never to have loved at all."
I have to wonder how many times Tennyson saw the bottom side of that investment portfolio? It only takes once to feel the pain. To love and to not have one's love returned in equal portion (nor even at all) is not a quick-market recovery. To fully invest in love's market means to lay it all on the line at considerable risk. To roll in that market, you have to be willing to go "all-in" and be willing to lay it all on the line.
Jesus invests in the same markets. "...who for the joy set before Him..."(Hebrews 12:2) is what is said of how Jesus endured the shame and pain of the cross. While it is perhaps easier to hear those words knowing that His suffering secured the redemption of any soul who is willing to accept Him as Savior, it is not easy to hear those words when we consider all those who simply reject what Christ has done for them -- those who perhaps will never accept His love. The price was paid no less for them. He risked it all first, even when we say "no thanks" and walk away.
I'm coming to realize the only way we can ever truly experience the fullest capacities of love is to risk it all for the sake of it. It is likely the greatest risk to give all you are and all you have to someone else. Too often we take much less aggressive risks to assure that at least we have something left to call our own when the bell sounds at the end of relational exchanges and trading -- even if we are rejected. But can we say we have fully loved when we keep something of ourselves out of the relational market?
To love like God loves is an all-in risk. We must chance risking with possibly no return on the investment. "For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son..." That is the ultimate investment risk. For those who accept it, it is a risk we are eternally grateful He was willing to take.
We will do well when we are willing to risk loving the same way.
While I was always willing to save money for things I wanted from then on, some of that propensity for saving gave way to the lure of credit cards in later life. While I've never been held hostage by revolving credit, I have tended more toward a "buy it now, pay it off at the end of the month" mentality. That can be a little risky but to this day, barring any unforeseen circumstances, there is always satisfaction in seeing a zero balance on those accounts at the end of the month.
In more recent years, hitting mid-stride financially has afforded the opportunity at more risky financial ventures. Far, far from venture capitalist status, being able to roll just a few dollars into higher risk opportunities has been an interesting adventure. Not really a business section reader or a stock ticket watcher myself, I tend toward more spiritual interests. Consequently, I've left my higher risk investing to the hands and minds of trusted individuals who actually make their living risking other people's money. Monthly and quarterly statements have provided a thrilling kind of satisfaction in watching my money work for me. Until recent financial times... Now I watch with mouth gaping amazement and wonder if I'll ever see another "+" sign again?
Now the adage "the higher they rise, the harder they fall" seems to be the cry of the day. The higher the risk profile, apparently the deeper the subsequent losses. One advantage of being my current age is that I might have the fortunate opportunity of seeing those numbers bounce back in the next few years. For other more senior risk takers, those who ride the thrill induced side of investing, may not see "whoopee" numbers return again in their lifetime. I feel for those folks. I have thoughts of selling one of those cards to try and help one of them out... but there's not much of a market left for spectacular aged rookie cards these days either.
Risk always means the potential for loss. In the last year, the profile for my spiritual investing has been running at a relatively high clip. In my intentions to find God at deeping levels, He has led me to raise the bar in my relationships with others. In doing so, I've discovered a whole new level of risk. Any time we extend ourselves fully (or as fully as humanly possible at the time) there is risk involved. We risk giving something that may not come back, even in a lifetime or more.
Somewhere in the relationship markets of life we tend to anticipate a dollar-for-dollar return on our investments. We give "so much" to another individual and we expect "so much" (or maybe even more) in return. In some cases, we're not willing to go any deeper into our personal portfolios if we can't be sure we'll get a good return on our investment. But sometimes it just doesn't work out in a way that we get back what we give.
Tennyson once wrote, "I hold it true, whate'er befall; I feel it, when I sorrow most; 'Tis better to have loved and lost; Than never to have loved at all."
I have to wonder how many times Tennyson saw the bottom side of that investment portfolio? It only takes once to feel the pain. To love and to not have one's love returned in equal portion (nor even at all) is not a quick-market recovery. To fully invest in love's market means to lay it all on the line at considerable risk. To roll in that market, you have to be willing to go "all-in" and be willing to lay it all on the line.
Jesus invests in the same markets. "...who for the joy set before Him..."(Hebrews 12:2) is what is said of how Jesus endured the shame and pain of the cross. While it is perhaps easier to hear those words knowing that His suffering secured the redemption of any soul who is willing to accept Him as Savior, it is not easy to hear those words when we consider all those who simply reject what Christ has done for them -- those who perhaps will never accept His love. The price was paid no less for them. He risked it all first, even when we say "no thanks" and walk away.
I'm coming to realize the only way we can ever truly experience the fullest capacities of love is to risk it all for the sake of it. It is likely the greatest risk to give all you are and all you have to someone else. Too often we take much less aggressive risks to assure that at least we have something left to call our own when the bell sounds at the end of relational exchanges and trading -- even if we are rejected. But can we say we have fully loved when we keep something of ourselves out of the relational market?
To love like God loves is an all-in risk. We must chance risking with possibly no return on the investment. "For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son..." That is the ultimate investment risk. For those who accept it, it is a risk we are eternally grateful He was willing to take.
We will do well when we are willing to risk loving the same way.
Friday, February 27, 2009
How I Feel
I've prayed for as long as I can remember. Well into "mid-life" now (okay, more into it than I'd care to admit) I think back on my early days of prayer. "Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep. If I should die before I wake, I pray the Lord my soul to take. God bless Mommy and Daddy and..." and so it would go. And so it goes?
I don't exactly remember when my prayers changed, but they did. My prayers became more direct, less rhythmical and likely less innocent. They were more "mature" to be sure, but left little room to speak praise to the Creator celebrating all the amazing things He has done, is doing or will do and even less room for Him to speak. Too often, my prayers rolled into instant requests ("petition" is the churchy word for it) -- as if I were peeling off some divine shopping list -- I would sit, sometimes kneel, rarely stand... to tell God everything I wanted but rarely, if ever, gave Him room to speak.
One day though I heard from Him. It wasn't necessarily a voice as classically defined, but He definitely spoke and our conversations changed again. Now while the words were the same, the movements were different, stronger, better, more passionate... filled with wonder and awe. Then... one day... we spoke differently, still. Rather than me telling God only what I wanted (knowing that He could -- and maybe would -- provide my request)... I told Him how I felt.
I waiting to hear from Him again... and I waited some more... and waited still. I waited so long I thought maybe He had forgotten me. I waited and wondered if my feelings had somehow offended Him. Then, one day He spoke again. It was not a "yes" or a "no" about something I wanted (or even needed)... God spoke about how I felt and He mentioned how He felt, too. The experience still brings tears to my eyes because it was so real and so personal. Sharing feelings between the two of us.
What is true about prayer I'm finding is true in some of the most important relationships in my life. I can hear what people want and I may even be fortunate to hear what they need. But how often do we share how we feel? Sharing feelings opens up the deepest places inside us. It lets someone into the chambers of self where we can be most afraid. Places we usually keep locked up and guarded. Rejecting what I want (or even need) is one thing. But rejecting how I feel, dismisses the very essence of who I am. It is scary to share how we feel.
You can tell me what you want and not go very deep with me. You can share what you need and we'll get closer once you trust I won't reject you for being honest. But tell me how you feel and we begin finding deep relationship. Share with me how you feel and we can experience unimaginable things!
Whether in prayer or in the most important relationships of life, it is important to share how we feel. God waits to share relationship - intimacy - with us at every level. There are at least a few people in life who want the same thing with you, but you've got to be willing to risk going there with them.
God loves you more than you can imagine. Some people in your life love you more than you can imagine, too. But if you don't trust them with how you really feel, how will you ever really be close?
Please... tell me how you feel.
I don't exactly remember when my prayers changed, but they did. My prayers became more direct, less rhythmical and likely less innocent. They were more "mature" to be sure, but left little room to speak praise to the Creator celebrating all the amazing things He has done, is doing or will do and even less room for Him to speak. Too often, my prayers rolled into instant requests ("petition" is the churchy word for it) -- as if I were peeling off some divine shopping list -- I would sit, sometimes kneel, rarely stand... to tell God everything I wanted but rarely, if ever, gave Him room to speak.
One day though I heard from Him. It wasn't necessarily a voice as classically defined, but He definitely spoke and our conversations changed again. Now while the words were the same, the movements were different, stronger, better, more passionate... filled with wonder and awe. Then... one day... we spoke differently, still. Rather than me telling God only what I wanted (knowing that He could -- and maybe would -- provide my request)... I told Him how I felt.
I waiting to hear from Him again... and I waited some more... and waited still. I waited so long I thought maybe He had forgotten me. I waited and wondered if my feelings had somehow offended Him. Then, one day He spoke again. It was not a "yes" or a "no" about something I wanted (or even needed)... God spoke about how I felt and He mentioned how He felt, too. The experience still brings tears to my eyes because it was so real and so personal. Sharing feelings between the two of us.
What is true about prayer I'm finding is true in some of the most important relationships in my life. I can hear what people want and I may even be fortunate to hear what they need. But how often do we share how we feel? Sharing feelings opens up the deepest places inside us. It lets someone into the chambers of self where we can be most afraid. Places we usually keep locked up and guarded. Rejecting what I want (or even need) is one thing. But rejecting how I feel, dismisses the very essence of who I am. It is scary to share how we feel.
You can tell me what you want and not go very deep with me. You can share what you need and we'll get closer once you trust I won't reject you for being honest. But tell me how you feel and we begin finding deep relationship. Share with me how you feel and we can experience unimaginable things!
Whether in prayer or in the most important relationships of life, it is important to share how we feel. God waits to share relationship - intimacy - with us at every level. There are at least a few people in life who want the same thing with you, but you've got to be willing to risk going there with them.
God loves you more than you can imagine. Some people in your life love you more than you can imagine, too. But if you don't trust them with how you really feel, how will you ever really be close?
Please... tell me how you feel.
Thursday, February 19, 2009
Bumps
I ride motorcycles. There is little about riding motorcycles that I don't like, but one thing I can do without are the "bumps." You know... the "bumps" in the road: speedbumps, uneven pavement, frost heave, or any other form of "bumps" -- I find completely annoying. Hit a frost heave at a significant clip and the "fun" really begins.
There are plenty of parallels between motorcycling and life. There are enough parallels that were I to include them all here, you'd be clicking to the next blog faster that you will anyway! But at the risk of having you jump in the passing lane and leave this entry behind, I'd like to offer a quick observation.
If "Life is a Highway" (as suggested by the lyrics of Tom Cochran and sung better (in my opinion) by Rascal Flatts) then it is going to have some bumps, too. And here is the paradox between life and motorcycling. While I generally "hate" the bumps on the bike, I am learning to embrace the bumps of life because the outcome is typically much more reliable than when I am riding.
Similar to riding though, it is always wise to cast your vision in life as far down the road as possible. But there are bumps in life we simply can't anticipate and even when we can anticipate them, what we choose to do with the disruption is a function of wisdom and maturity.
Today, a portion of my life hit a good sized bump and I realize I'm going to land on both wheels (though maybe not at the same time -- and when it is the front wheel hitting the ground first that's REALLY exciting). The thing I'm trying to remember is to keep the throttle on, adjust to the landing and just keep on riding. It's a bump... and that's life (and riding).
There are plenty of parallels between motorcycling and life. There are enough parallels that were I to include them all here, you'd be clicking to the next blog faster that you will anyway! But at the risk of having you jump in the passing lane and leave this entry behind, I'd like to offer a quick observation.
If "Life is a Highway" (as suggested by the lyrics of Tom Cochran and sung better (in my opinion) by Rascal Flatts) then it is going to have some bumps, too. And here is the paradox between life and motorcycling. While I generally "hate" the bumps on the bike, I am learning to embrace the bumps of life because the outcome is typically much more reliable than when I am riding.
Similar to riding though, it is always wise to cast your vision in life as far down the road as possible. But there are bumps in life we simply can't anticipate and even when we can anticipate them, what we choose to do with the disruption is a function of wisdom and maturity.
Today, a portion of my life hit a good sized bump and I realize I'm going to land on both wheels (though maybe not at the same time -- and when it is the front wheel hitting the ground first that's REALLY exciting). The thing I'm trying to remember is to keep the throttle on, adjust to the landing and just keep on riding. It's a bump... and that's life (and riding).
Friday, January 16, 2009
On Purpose
As popular as Rick Warren's book, "The Purpose Driven Life" has become (I recently heard it has become the greatest selling book of all time other than the Bible) I wonder how many of us are really living "on purpose."
It seems from childhood we're oriented away from purposeful living. I can't imagine how many times I did something wrong and then tried to defend myself with the phrase, "But I didn't do it on purpose!" While that never seemed to get me off the hook of trouble, it may have been a telling sign of things to come.
To live "on purpose" is no easy thing. Consider Rick's book, and the accompanying Purpose Driven Journal, and Purpose Driven Daily Calendar, and the Purpose Driven Night Light (okay, I made that last one up...I think), the purpose of each of those resources is to help people live "on purpose." More than great marketing, the vast selection of "Purpose Driven" products indicates we need tools and resources to live on purpose. We need reminders to live "on purpose" and even if we are reminded to find our purpose and then live it... the bottom line is it requires a bunch of hard work to do it.
Life is much easier when lived simply on "cruise control" or "auto pilot." There is little thought required about what we've been or what we're becoming. But living on purpose requires a ton of effort and some much needed resources. One of the things we need to live on purpose is intimacy with the Creator (He is the One who ultimately knows what we're created to be). If we avoid intimacy with the One who made us, then it is much easier to avoid who we really are.
Living on purpose also demands personal integrity and honest self-evaluation. Those long stares in the mirror of self-reflection (even actually physically staring into a mirror long enough to deal with yourself is a powerful experience -- for more on this, see my blog entry on Sept. 22, 2008) can be a sobering. Not only taking the inevitable criticism from others, but inviting input from friends and trusted advisers is necessary to see ourselves for who we really are and to be more aware of who and what we're becoming.
To have those things in your life are as blessed as they are necessary and sometimes you have to go find them. I've not always been one who sought out critical input, but over the years I've seen myself move from resisting it to actually welcoming and inviting it. I have some of the best friends and confidants ever, who love me enough to be honest about what they see in me and are willing to walk with me toward being better. I have found space in my life that allows me to test who I'm becoming without rejection. All of those things are not only necessary for my life, they have been put there on purpose.
Though we all make too many mistakes, when we do make them, there is no need to say, "I didn't do it on purpose." Living a life "on purpose," we acknowledge our mistakes for what they are and then move on purposefully. Not everyone wants to allow us to do that. Some will hang our mistakes over us or never let them go. If that is the case, the burden falls to them to figure out their purpose, not to you. There is only one Judge and we can be assured, it isn't the person that won't let you forget your mistakes, especially those mistakes that were made when trying to live on purpose.
Every step we take, good or bad, is one step closer to a life lived on purpose. So keep moving along, my friend... we have lives to live, on purpose!
It seems from childhood we're oriented away from purposeful living. I can't imagine how many times I did something wrong and then tried to defend myself with the phrase, "But I didn't do it on purpose!" While that never seemed to get me off the hook of trouble, it may have been a telling sign of things to come.
To live "on purpose" is no easy thing. Consider Rick's book, and the accompanying Purpose Driven Journal, and Purpose Driven Daily Calendar, and the Purpose Driven Night Light (okay, I made that last one up...I think), the purpose of each of those resources is to help people live "on purpose." More than great marketing, the vast selection of "Purpose Driven" products indicates we need tools and resources to live on purpose. We need reminders to live "on purpose" and even if we are reminded to find our purpose and then live it... the bottom line is it requires a bunch of hard work to do it.
Life is much easier when lived simply on "cruise control" or "auto pilot." There is little thought required about what we've been or what we're becoming. But living on purpose requires a ton of effort and some much needed resources. One of the things we need to live on purpose is intimacy with the Creator (He is the One who ultimately knows what we're created to be). If we avoid intimacy with the One who made us, then it is much easier to avoid who we really are.
Living on purpose also demands personal integrity and honest self-evaluation. Those long stares in the mirror of self-reflection (even actually physically staring into a mirror long enough to deal with yourself is a powerful experience -- for more on this, see my blog entry on Sept. 22, 2008) can be a sobering. Not only taking the inevitable criticism from others, but inviting input from friends and trusted advisers is necessary to see ourselves for who we really are and to be more aware of who and what we're becoming.
To have those things in your life are as blessed as they are necessary and sometimes you have to go find them. I've not always been one who sought out critical input, but over the years I've seen myself move from resisting it to actually welcoming and inviting it. I have some of the best friends and confidants ever, who love me enough to be honest about what they see in me and are willing to walk with me toward being better. I have found space in my life that allows me to test who I'm becoming without rejection. All of those things are not only necessary for my life, they have been put there on purpose.
Though we all make too many mistakes, when we do make them, there is no need to say, "I didn't do it on purpose." Living a life "on purpose," we acknowledge our mistakes for what they are and then move on purposefully. Not everyone wants to allow us to do that. Some will hang our mistakes over us or never let them go. If that is the case, the burden falls to them to figure out their purpose, not to you. There is only one Judge and we can be assured, it isn't the person that won't let you forget your mistakes, especially those mistakes that were made when trying to live on purpose.
Every step we take, good or bad, is one step closer to a life lived on purpose. So keep moving along, my friend... we have lives to live, on purpose!
Monday, January 05, 2009
Resolute
New Year's resolutions are highly overrated. Part of the reason is because far too often the burden of fulfilling the resolution falls solely to the individual making the resolution. We resolve on our own what should be or should do and then we are left to make the resolution a reality (often in isolation). Typically, the net result is failure within a matter of days, if not weeks and the guilt of a "broken resolution" is the remnant of great intentions.
I'm convinced "commitments" are a better path, especially commitments made in community (with other people). In a community of others we lean on their love and support not only to fulfill a commitment we've made, but we can actually utilize the community's input to discern what the commitment ought to be in the first place. Other people can see who we really are sometimes better than we see ourselves.
Left to myself, I'll too often make commitments (or resolutions, New Year's or otherwise) that are simply too comfortable or too easy to attain. For example, if I make a commitment to go to the gym and work out 4 days a week, but I'm already working out 3 days a week, that commitment isn't too big a stretch. Additionally, it won't make a HUGE difference in my physical conditioning (unless I'm an elite athlete) in that one day's absence or presence in the gym.
Relationally, spiritually, developmentally... we do the same thing. We take a path of "least resistance" in our personal development and then fall short of what we are fully capable of achieving. How many relationships (friendships, marriages, teams, etc.) stay "stuck" at an immature level because no one pushes for something greater? How many spiritual "giants" never grow into their potential because no one steps into their life and challenges them to greatness? How many skills or gifts go untapped because no one was invited (or had the courage to say something) to support them into reality? We need to be resolute toward something more than resolutions!
In community, a group of trusted people can offer input and challenge into life that will yield a HUGE difference in our becoming better people. Of course, trust is a HUGE factor in this process but the overall outcome offers more promise than simply making individual resolutions.
For Christ-followers, the addition of God's input in the process of discerning (through prayer, Scripture reading, meditation, fasting, etc.) can yield unimaginable results. What new commitment might be confirmed, supported and then realized into fruition if we shared our commitments with others?
This year, I've made a commitment to have "deeper and more meaningful relationship" with people God puts in my proximity. I have a group of people who, I trust and believe, will hold me accountable and help me make progress in that commitment. It isn't easy work, but that is all the more reason why it should occur in community.
Rather than "resolving to fail" like I have so many times in the past(some of us may have already "missed the mark" on this New Year's resolutions), perhaps we can "resolve to be resolute" and utilize our faith and our community to advance who we are as people. In community, we will watch ourselves and others grow and change as we become more of what we are capable of being.
I'm convinced "commitments" are a better path, especially commitments made in community (with other people). In a community of others we lean on their love and support not only to fulfill a commitment we've made, but we can actually utilize the community's input to discern what the commitment ought to be in the first place. Other people can see who we really are sometimes better than we see ourselves.
Left to myself, I'll too often make commitments (or resolutions, New Year's or otherwise) that are simply too comfortable or too easy to attain. For example, if I make a commitment to go to the gym and work out 4 days a week, but I'm already working out 3 days a week, that commitment isn't too big a stretch. Additionally, it won't make a HUGE difference in my physical conditioning (unless I'm an elite athlete) in that one day's absence or presence in the gym.
Relationally, spiritually, developmentally... we do the same thing. We take a path of "least resistance" in our personal development and then fall short of what we are fully capable of achieving. How many relationships (friendships, marriages, teams, etc.) stay "stuck" at an immature level because no one pushes for something greater? How many spiritual "giants" never grow into their potential because no one steps into their life and challenges them to greatness? How many skills or gifts go untapped because no one was invited (or had the courage to say something) to support them into reality? We need to be resolute toward something more than resolutions!
In community, a group of trusted people can offer input and challenge into life that will yield a HUGE difference in our becoming better people. Of course, trust is a HUGE factor in this process but the overall outcome offers more promise than simply making individual resolutions.
For Christ-followers, the addition of God's input in the process of discerning (through prayer, Scripture reading, meditation, fasting, etc.) can yield unimaginable results. What new commitment might be confirmed, supported and then realized into fruition if we shared our commitments with others?
This year, I've made a commitment to have "deeper and more meaningful relationship" with people God puts in my proximity. I have a group of people who, I trust and believe, will hold me accountable and help me make progress in that commitment. It isn't easy work, but that is all the more reason why it should occur in community.
Rather than "resolving to fail" like I have so many times in the past(some of us may have already "missed the mark" on this New Year's resolutions), perhaps we can "resolve to be resolute" and utilize our faith and our community to advance who we are as people. In community, we will watch ourselves and others grow and change as we become more of what we are capable of being.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Doing Life Together
Thursday night is usually "small group" night at our house. Tonight was no exception.
Arriving with the fatigue of the day close on our heals, we gathered again tonight to spend a little time together, read God's word, share some laughs and perhaps a few tears, too.
What an amazing thing "community" is! 10 people (only eight present tonight) from such diverse backgrounds and experiences and yet, sharing one thing in common: Doing Life Together.
God lives in "community" (Read Genesis 1 closely and you'll find that God shares community even within Himself) and God has created us to live in community as well. Though silence and solitude have their place in our spiritual development, we are created as communal creatures (in God's image) and it is not surprising we need each other.
I am honored to be "doing life together" with the people in the group that meets at our house. They are an amazing gathering of people that can fill a room with laughter and tears in the same hour and I'm always the better for having been together! I hope and pray they are, too.
I also hope and pray you have people that you are "doing life together" with as well. Living in community is one of the great blessings of the human existence.
Tuesday, November 04, 2008
Between Want and Need
Where is the line between "want" and "need?" It is a curious question to be sure.
Abraham Maslow effectively took a step toward the question when he developed his somewhat famous Hierarchy of Need. Maslow, a "humanist psychologist," principally believed in the potential of the human individual. He proposed that all human beings have ever-increasing opportunity to reach fuller potential within their being. Humanists seek the potential of being a "fully functioning" individual or as Maslow described it, a "self-actualized" person.
Often visually presented in the form of a pyramid or triangle, the most basic human needs represent the bottom level of the pyramid and these needs then graduate toward the top until the highest extent of the needs are fulfilled.
The most primitive of Maslow's needs are "physiological needs." These are biological needs consisting of oxygen, food, water and a relatively constant body temperature. These are the fundamental physical needs for sustaining life itself. These would come as first priority in a person's level of satisfaction. As someone who greatly dislikes being cold, I get this concept!
The next level involves "safety needs." When basic physiological needs are fulfilled and no longer control active thought or behavior, the needs for security are engaged. Adults have little awareness of their security needs until times of emergency or periods of extended distress or danger. Children on the other hand frequently display this need for security. That's why it is sometimes difficult to rid a child from their "blankie" or their "binky." Feelings of security are important.
With the physiological and safety needs fulfilled, an individual next seeks love, affection and belonging. Maslow suggested people will find some means to overcome feelings of loneliness and alienation. This involves both the giving and receiving of love and finding and/or providing a sense of belonging. This is why few people do well in extended isolation. We are creatures who are created in community (God in creation as Father, Son and Holy Spirit) and are meant for community.
Following the fulfillment of the first three, the need for esteem becomes prominent. Both self-esteem and affirmation from others helps establish self-respect and a personal sense of value. When these needs are not appropriately met, an individual may exhibit inferiority, weakness, worthlessness, helplessness or various other forms of dysfunction.
Finally, when all the foregoing needs are met, according to Maslow the needs for "self-actualization" are empowered. Maslow described "self-actualization" as a person's need to "be" and to "do" what they were created to be and do. A dancer "must" dance, a writer "must" write, or a musician "must" play. Without that opportunity, the individual becomes agitated or restless. They will sense something is lacking in their life. God creates all people "in His image" (Gen. 1:27) and gives them purpose, function and meaning. How we respond to that created "being" is displayed by the things we "do."
According to this theory, if something in the first four levels is "missing" in life, it can be relatively easy to determine what the "need" is. If someone is hungry, there are physical symptoms declaring the hunger (hmmm... my stomach just growled reminding me I skipped dinner earlier tonight). If someone is in danger, the mind and body will react accordingly ("fight" or "flight"). If someone is denied affirmation or blessings, it will appear in their general disposition or attitude. But things get much more difficult to define in the "self-actualized" needs.
Whether we adhere to Maslow's "Hierarchy of Need" theory or not, one thing stands to reason and Truth... in order to truly "be" who we are meant to be by God's design, we must be "authentic" about who we are.
A rich young man once came to Jesus declaring he was basically "self-actualized" (though, of course, Maslow hadn't quite yet arrived on the scene) according to the way he lived by the Law (see Mark 10:17-27). Jesus agreed that he was doing well with the whole human "doing" thing... but when Jesus told the rich young man to sell "everything" and give it to the poor and follow Him... the guy couldn't do it. Jesus words struck at the very heart of the guy's authenticity. The young man's "being" didn't match up to his "doing." The guy left Jesus a very "sad" and "rich" young man.
On the other hand, there was a very poor widow woman who came into the temple courts and put in two very small copper coins, worth only a fraction of a penny. Calling His followers close to Him, Jesus said the widow had "put more into the treasury than all the other" people because she gave all she had to live on (Mark. 12:41-44). There was a woman who's "doing" match up with her "being" quite well.
Sometimes the line between "need" and "want" is quite thin. Even in our earthly relationships, we sometimes have difficulty finding the difference. A child really "needs" the attention of her parent and finds she isn't getting much of it. She will declare what she "wants" to ease the loss or attention or she'll act out negatively to find the attention she needs even though the bad behavior it isn't really what she wants.
A spouse really "needs" reassurance in their marriage that their spouse is wholly devoted to them, but they are only seem comfortable leaving hints at what they "want out of this relationship" rather than sitting down and confidently sharing what both really "need" from one another.
Yes, the line between "want" and "need" is sometimes thin indeed.
Perhaps the best way of finding our ourselves between our wants and our needs is to start with simply being purely authentic people. Maybe instead of hoping people will find out what we want, we need to be "authentic" enough with one another to simply confess what we "need." If you're cold, ask for a blanket. If you are scared, ask a good person for a hug. If you feel "left out" of everything, discover the company of a trusted person, and instead of waiting for them to read your mind, maybe you should simply invite them over to spend some time together.
If you are feeling lousy about yourself, ask someone you respect to remind you of how much God loves you and what a beautiful person you are because He made you just as He designed you. And if you are struggling with who God created you to be, talk with Him about it. When we come to God honestly and authentically, we discover amazing things about Him and about ourselves as well.
Do you want to comment? If so, I need to hear from you if you are willing to share.
Abraham Maslow effectively took a step toward the question when he developed his somewhat famous Hierarchy of Need. Maslow, a "humanist psychologist," principally believed in the potential of the human individual. He proposed that all human beings have ever-increasing opportunity to reach fuller potential within their being. Humanists seek the potential of being a "fully functioning" individual or as Maslow described it, a "self-actualized" person.
Often visually presented in the form of a pyramid or triangle, the most basic human needs represent the bottom level of the pyramid and these needs then graduate toward the top until the highest extent of the needs are fulfilled.
The most primitive of Maslow's needs are "physiological needs." These are biological needs consisting of oxygen, food, water and a relatively constant body temperature. These are the fundamental physical needs for sustaining life itself. These would come as first priority in a person's level of satisfaction. As someone who greatly dislikes being cold, I get this concept!
The next level involves "safety needs." When basic physiological needs are fulfilled and no longer control active thought or behavior, the needs for security are engaged. Adults have little awareness of their security needs until times of emergency or periods of extended distress or danger. Children on the other hand frequently display this need for security. That's why it is sometimes difficult to rid a child from their "blankie" or their "binky." Feelings of security are important.
With the physiological and safety needs fulfilled, an individual next seeks love, affection and belonging. Maslow suggested people will find some means to overcome feelings of loneliness and alienation. This involves both the giving and receiving of love and finding and/or providing a sense of belonging. This is why few people do well in extended isolation. We are creatures who are created in community (God in creation as Father, Son and Holy Spirit) and are meant for community.
Following the fulfillment of the first three, the need for esteem becomes prominent. Both self-esteem and affirmation from others helps establish self-respect and a personal sense of value. When these needs are not appropriately met, an individual may exhibit inferiority, weakness, worthlessness, helplessness or various other forms of dysfunction.
Finally, when all the foregoing needs are met, according to Maslow the needs for "self-actualization" are empowered. Maslow described "self-actualization" as a person's need to "be" and to "do" what they were created to be and do. A dancer "must" dance, a writer "must" write, or a musician "must" play. Without that opportunity, the individual becomes agitated or restless. They will sense something is lacking in their life. God creates all people "in His image" (Gen. 1:27) and gives them purpose, function and meaning. How we respond to that created "being" is displayed by the things we "do."
According to this theory, if something in the first four levels is "missing" in life, it can be relatively easy to determine what the "need" is. If someone is hungry, there are physical symptoms declaring the hunger (hmmm... my stomach just growled reminding me I skipped dinner earlier tonight). If someone is in danger, the mind and body will react accordingly ("fight" or "flight"). If someone is denied affirmation or blessings, it will appear in their general disposition or attitude. But things get much more difficult to define in the "self-actualized" needs.
Whether we adhere to Maslow's "Hierarchy of Need" theory or not, one thing stands to reason and Truth... in order to truly "be" who we are meant to be by God's design, we must be "authentic" about who we are.
A rich young man once came to Jesus declaring he was basically "self-actualized" (though, of course, Maslow hadn't quite yet arrived on the scene) according to the way he lived by the Law (see Mark 10:17-27). Jesus agreed that he was doing well with the whole human "doing" thing... but when Jesus told the rich young man to sell "everything" and give it to the poor and follow Him... the guy couldn't do it. Jesus words struck at the very heart of the guy's authenticity. The young man's "being" didn't match up to his "doing." The guy left Jesus a very "sad" and "rich" young man.
On the other hand, there was a very poor widow woman who came into the temple courts and put in two very small copper coins, worth only a fraction of a penny. Calling His followers close to Him, Jesus said the widow had "put more into the treasury than all the other" people because she gave all she had to live on (Mark. 12:41-44). There was a woman who's "doing" match up with her "being" quite well.
Sometimes the line between "need" and "want" is quite thin. Even in our earthly relationships, we sometimes have difficulty finding the difference. A child really "needs" the attention of her parent and finds she isn't getting much of it. She will declare what she "wants" to ease the loss or attention or she'll act out negatively to find the attention she needs even though the bad behavior it isn't really what she wants.
A spouse really "needs" reassurance in their marriage that their spouse is wholly devoted to them, but they are only seem comfortable leaving hints at what they "want out of this relationship" rather than sitting down and confidently sharing what both really "need" from one another.
Yes, the line between "want" and "need" is sometimes thin indeed.
Perhaps the best way of finding our ourselves between our wants and our needs is to start with simply being purely authentic people. Maybe instead of hoping people will find out what we want, we need to be "authentic" enough with one another to simply confess what we "need." If you're cold, ask for a blanket. If you are scared, ask a good person for a hug. If you feel "left out" of everything, discover the company of a trusted person, and instead of waiting for them to read your mind, maybe you should simply invite them over to spend some time together.
If you are feeling lousy about yourself, ask someone you respect to remind you of how much God loves you and what a beautiful person you are because He made you just as He designed you. And if you are struggling with who God created you to be, talk with Him about it. When we come to God honestly and authentically, we discover amazing things about Him and about ourselves as well.
Do you want to comment? If so, I need to hear from you if you are willing to share.
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Thirsty
Have you ever been thirsty? I mean the kind of thirst that you remember like it was yesterday? We’ve all been thirsty, but do you remember that parched, thick tongued aching thirst that simply can’t be ignored? On a long hike turned bad (poor planning on my part) many years ago, I experienced the worst thirst of my life and will never forget it.Have you ever been thirsty? I mean the kind of thirst that you remember like it was yesterday? We’ve all been thirsty, but do you remember that parched, thick tongued aching thirst that simply can’t be ignored? On a long hike turned bad (poor planning on my part) many years ago, I experienced the worst thirst of my life and will never forget it.
Maybe you’re thirsty right now. Just the mere mention of water has you looking for the nearest drinking fountain or you’ve already abandoned your computer to go to the kitchen and retrieve a glass of ice cold water. That is not the kind of thirst I’m talking about. But, if you need to go and get some water now, please do. That’s fine, I’ll wait.
Welcome back. Tastes good, doesn’t it? Refreshing and welcomed, there is nothing like a good glass of water. Water happens to be my most frequent drink of choice. Trying to avoid the certain gains that come with sugar laden beverages, I drink water most of the time. It isn’t really something I even think much about anymore. A tall, clear glass of water can’t be beat for refreshment and life. I heard recently that to be healthy, the average person should consume 2 ½ quarts of water per day. I’ve got that down, easily!
Nothing is much worse than being really thirsty and getting only a little water. You need a 44-ouncer… and you only get a Dixie cup. Oh, it might give you the minimum you need to survive, but being satisfied is nowhere to be found. It might even be torture to be truly thirsty and only get enough to tease the need.
Jesus once told a woman, “whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life” (John 4:14). Hearing what Jesus said, the woman replied, “Sir, give me this water so that I won’t get thirsty.” After that, they never spoke again about water. In fact, she left the water jar she was carrying and ran to tell everyone in her town that she had found the Christ (4:29).
On that hike, a friend and I found a little spring at a rocky outcropping. It was very shallow and I only hoped it was pure enough to not make me sick, but I had to have water. I cleared a little pool, let some of the sediment and sticks settle and then just stuck my face in the ground and started sucking up water as fast as I could. Spitting out the sticks and maybe a bug or two, I didn’t get enough water, but I did get some.
A lot of us are spiritually thirsty enough that we are looking for water. Sometimes we’re content with only sticking our face in the ground and spitting out the sticks. But it’s not enough. Jesus invites us to drink from a well that rises up from within us. It is a “Spirit” thing… and can easily be ignored, while we thirst nonetheless. Religion (or simply going through the motions of faith) won’t get you there. Like trying to satisfy real thirst with a little cup, religion might tease your spirit, but you will never be fully satisfied. Only true relationship with Jesus will ever satisfy the deep thirst within.
Are you thirsty? Ask Jesus for some real water…
Maybe you’re thirsty right now. Just the mere mention of water has you looking for the nearest drinking fountain or you’ve already abandoned your computer to go to the kitchen and retrieve a glass of ice cold water. That is not the kind of thirst I’m talking about. But, if you need to go and get some water now, please do. That’s fine, I’ll wait.
Welcome back. Tastes good, doesn’t it? Refreshing and welcomed, there is nothing like a good glass of water. Water happens to be my most frequent drink of choice. Trying to avoid the certain gains that come with sugar laden beverages, I drink water most of the time. It isn’t really something I even think much about anymore. A tall, clear glass of water can’t be beat for refreshment and life. I heard recently that to be healthy, the average person should consume 2 ½ quarts of water per day. I’ve got that down, easily!
Nothing is much worse than being really thirsty and getting only a little water. You need a 44-ouncer… and you only get a Dixie cup. Oh, it might give you the minimum you need to survive, but being satisfied is nowhere to be found. It might even be torture to be truly thirsty and only get enough to tease the need.
Jesus once told a woman, “whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life” (John 4:14). Hearing what Jesus said, the woman replied, “Sir, give me this water so that I won’t get thirsty.” After that, they never spoke again about water. In fact, she left the water jar she was carrying and ran to tell everyone in her town that she had found the Christ (4:29).
On that hike, a friend and I found a little spring at a rocky outcropping. It was very shallow and I only hoped it was pure enough to not make me sick, but I had to have water. I cleared a little pool, let some of the sediment and sticks settle and then just stuck my face in the ground and started sucking up water as fast as I could. Spitting out the sticks and maybe a bug or two, I didn’t get enough water, but I did get some.
A lot of us are spiritually thirsty enough that we are looking for water. Sometimes we’re content with only sticking our face in the ground and spitting out the sticks. But it’s not enough. Jesus invites us to drink from a well that rises up from within us. It is a “Spirit” thing… and can easily be ignored, while we thirst nonetheless. Religion (or simply going through the motions of faith) won’t get you there. Like trying to satisfy real thirst with a little cup, religion might tease your spirit, but you will never be fully satisfied. Only true relationship with Jesus will ever satisfy the deep thirst within.
Are you thirsty? Ask Jesus for some real water…
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Last Meow
Over 15 years ago I received that phone call from my wife. Not the that phone call... she'd already given me that news 5 months earlier! Pregnant with our second child, my wife found twin Manx/Himalayan kittens that "had to have a home." Somehow, between the strategic planning of mother (grandmother) and adult daughter, our family wound up with a second cat (we'd already had "Bunkley" for over six years)!
Our first daughter had already named them both before I could even get home that day. Ours would be named "Tiger" and Nanny's cat would be named "Buddy."
When I did arrive home, I had to admit the little guys were cute and being bred with nothing more than a mere "nub" for a tail made them rather unique. Though I never fully adored Tiger, I didn't mind him too much either.
Later, dogs would come and go through the mix of animals in our house... but Tiger was a standard feature who seemed built to last. Now, well over 15 years old, he'd recently begun to have trouble remembering what a cat box is for and after virtually destroying the blessed aroma of our master bedroom suite (not to mention the need to now replace carpet that is less than four years old)... it was time for him to go! Any volunteers? Nope... Dad gets the nod!
Therefore, last Friday was not an easy day. I checked online for the closest and most reasonably priced facility to help with our "problem." I've done this routine before (Bunkley's departure was quite emotional for us, too), so it was nothing new to me. But it is never easy to "determine" the final day of a pet's life. Whether chronically ill or just too old to function properly, it is hard to hear the "last meow."
Since that day last Friday, I've been thinking much about what it must be like for God to watch the "clock" of our lives tick down to that last second. A friend just lost her step dad yesterday. He fought aggressive cancer for 8 months and passed from this life yesterday at noon. October 20, 2008 was his last day in this place. God knew it all along. The man's family painfully saw it coming and began adjusting to that last breath the moment it was breathed, but still it is understandably difficult for them.
I wonder if it is as difficult for God to watch that life clock tick down for someone as it is for us? "All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be" (Psalm 139:16). Even as I write this blog, "Chole" the stray Bichie-Poo (Bichon Poodle mix) we found running behind a friends house a few months ago is laying asleep on my lap, content beyond all apparent measure. We do love our pets, don't we?
God loves His children, too. But when we advance beyond this life to one which is better by far (Phil 1:23) surely it is better for all of us. Perhaps it is even for God! Maybe that remedies some of the pain that is left behind in this place and for those of us who have to wait a while longer. I simply don't know...
Our house is still recovering from Tiger's misfortune (both aromatically and emotionally). It was weird to decide "today" was the day and that reality still lingers in my mind -- we had to choose what day that would be. It makes me appreciate the Creator all the more... He is amazing and His wisdom to know the "whens and wheres" of our existence is something for which I must bow and give praise.
Our first daughter had already named them both before I could even get home that day. Ours would be named "Tiger" and Nanny's cat would be named "Buddy."
When I did arrive home, I had to admit the little guys were cute and being bred with nothing more than a mere "nub" for a tail made them rather unique. Though I never fully adored Tiger, I didn't mind him too much either.Later, dogs would come and go through the mix of animals in our house... but Tiger was a standard feature who seemed built to last. Now, well over 15 years old, he'd recently begun to have trouble remembering what a cat box is for and after virtually destroying the blessed aroma of our master bedroom suite (not to mention the need to now replace carpet that is less than four years old)... it was time for him to go! Any volunteers? Nope... Dad gets the nod!
Therefore, last Friday was not an easy day. I checked online for the closest and most reasonably priced facility to help with our "problem." I've done this routine before (Bunkley's departure was quite emotional for us, too), so it was nothing new to me. But it is never easy to "determine" the final day of a pet's life. Whether chronically ill or just too old to function properly, it is hard to hear the "last meow."
Since that day last Friday, I've been thinking much about what it must be like for God to watch the "clock" of our lives tick down to that last second. A friend just lost her step dad yesterday. He fought aggressive cancer for 8 months and passed from this life yesterday at noon. October 20, 2008 was his last day in this place. God knew it all along. The man's family painfully saw it coming and began adjusting to that last breath the moment it was breathed, but still it is understandably difficult for them.
I wonder if it is as difficult for God to watch that life clock tick down for someone as it is for us? "All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be" (Psalm 139:16). Even as I write this blog, "Chole" the stray Bichie-Poo (Bichon Poodle mix) we found running behind a friends house a few months ago is laying asleep on my lap, content beyond all apparent measure. We do love our pets, don't we?
God loves His children, too. But when we advance beyond this life to one which is better by far (Phil 1:23) surely it is better for all of us. Perhaps it is even for God! Maybe that remedies some of the pain that is left behind in this place and for those of us who have to wait a while longer. I simply don't know...
Our house is still recovering from Tiger's misfortune (both aromatically and emotionally). It was weird to decide "today" was the day and that reality still lingers in my mind -- we had to choose what day that would be. It makes me appreciate the Creator all the more... He is amazing and His wisdom to know the "whens and wheres" of our existence is something for which I must bow and give praise.
Monday, September 22, 2008
Fragile
Not much really scares me. At my age that may sound a bit adolescent, but I don't mean it that way. You'll appreciate that I've always been a "thrill seeking" kind of personality. Adventure sports have always had a strange allure that somehow always seems to draw me in. For me, risk has always been part of the reward. I would not suggest I go looking expressly for danger but when it presents itself, backing down does not tend to be high on my list of choices.
I've had my share of "close calls" and walked away from more than I deserved. I've never even been seriously hurt by any of these adventures and would just as soon keep it that way. Some might say if you haven't been seriously hurt by my age, you're probably not going hard enough. I'd challenge that philosophy. Wisdom is often the greater of valor without compromising the adventure. Nevertheless, speed is addictive, heights enthralling, depth and pressure challenging, balance captivating... the list goes on for the things that capture my attention and spirit. And I wonder why...
Lately I've been facing an adventure unlike many before. I've been venturing into the depths of who I really am. Taking that second or third glance in the mirror some mornings to see past the day's beard and the baggy
eyelids. Do you ever look deeply into your own eyes? Try it sometime... but don't allow yourself to escape too easily. If you stand there long enough, you'll begin to see and hear things that might look a bit dangerous. Your tendency will likely be to "cut and run," but (if anyone else is in the room, they may think you're weird, but that is part of the fun) I'd encourage you to stick it out a while. We'd rather not be "posers" now, would we?
It is ironic, but perhaps those who seek the greatest earthly risks and thrills are really the ones most fragile. One would think it to be the thick skinned, the fool-hearty, the rambunctious who chase dangerous things, but it may just be the opposite. The thinnest crystal resonates the finest tones, but it is also most fragile.
The other day my thoughts journeyed to the "edge" of me. Asking oneself, " Of what am I most afraid?" can be a sobering question. In one of those elongated mirrored stare downs, it hit me. "I'm most afraid of me." I'm afraid of having to face the very things I'm most capable of doling out to others. Rejection, abject loss, betrayal... and that's just in the first few blinks of self-reflection. What if I really got serious about this adventure? What then would I find?
Riding at high speeds, skimming down the face of waves, climbing rocky faces, swishing down slopes, diving down deep all require certain measures of confidence in one's own abilities. We trust our training and our experience to see us through even the most risky circumstances. But what happens when we run headlong into ourselves... where we can't simply twist the throttle or balance our way through it or reach down deep for that extra bit of "something" we need. What happens when it is simply us and the mirror... what then?
What about the occasions we have to trust someone else with the "real" us? What about when we are willing to put our heart into the hands of another (not speaking of a physician here, though the principle may equally apply)? What about when we give up looking out for ourselves first and our own interests first and finally sacrifice everything we have for the benefit of someone else? Let's talk about risk! And what exactly are we afraid of? Well... need I really say?
I realized the other day that the thing I'm most afraid of happening to me is the very thing I'm most often guilty of doing or being. It is that great "inadequacy" all of us face eventually if we stare long enough into that mirror. It is the exposure of true self and personal circumspection. Sometimes we cover all that up with makeup or some other disguise. Maybe a brash demeanor or an excessively quiet and reserved disposition or... maybe even "thrill" seeking? Either way... if we look long enough, we'll find that "thing" in all of us... and its fragile.
Maybe the greatest thrill is when we're willing to lay our lives out there and allow our greatest vulnerabilities to be realized and exposed. This is the place where speed can't move us away fast enough, climbing never takes us high enough out of its reach, diving is never deep enough to fully submerge from it... because we simply can't escape who we really are deep down inside.
So let me encourage you... take a couple extra moments and look into that mirror... step to the "edge" of you... and "go big, or don't go at all." You may be fragile like me, but the real adventure will have just begun!
I've had my share of "close calls" and walked away from more than I deserved. I've never even been seriously hurt by any of these adventures and would just as soon keep it that way. Some might say if you haven't been seriously hurt by my age, you're probably not going hard enough. I'd challenge that philosophy. Wisdom is often the greater of valor without compromising the adventure. Nevertheless, speed is addictive, heights enthralling, depth and pressure challenging, balance captivating... the list goes on for the things that capture my attention and spirit. And I wonder why...
Lately I've been facing an adventure unlike many before. I've been venturing into the depths of who I really am. Taking that second or third glance in the mirror some mornings to see past the day's beard and the baggy
eyelids. Do you ever look deeply into your own eyes? Try it sometime... but don't allow yourself to escape too easily. If you stand there long enough, you'll begin to see and hear things that might look a bit dangerous. Your tendency will likely be to "cut and run," but (if anyone else is in the room, they may think you're weird, but that is part of the fun) I'd encourage you to stick it out a while. We'd rather not be "posers" now, would we?It is ironic, but perhaps those who seek the greatest earthly risks and thrills are really the ones most fragile. One would think it to be the thick skinned, the fool-hearty, the rambunctious who chase dangerous things, but it may just be the opposite. The thinnest crystal resonates the finest tones, but it is also most fragile.
The other day my thoughts journeyed to the "edge" of me. Asking oneself, " Of what am I most afraid?" can be a sobering question. In one of those elongated mirrored stare downs, it hit me. "I'm most afraid of me." I'm afraid of having to face the very things I'm most capable of doling out to others. Rejection, abject loss, betrayal... and that's just in the first few blinks of self-reflection. What if I really got serious about this adventure? What then would I find?
Riding at high speeds, skimming down the face of waves, climbing rocky faces, swishing down slopes, diving down deep all require certain measures of confidence in one's own abilities. We trust our training and our experience to see us through even the most risky circumstances. But what happens when we run headlong into ourselves... where we can't simply twist the throttle or balance our way through it or reach down deep for that extra bit of "something" we need. What happens when it is simply us and the mirror... what then?
What about the occasions we have to trust someone else with the "real" us? What about when we are willing to put our heart into the hands of another (not speaking of a physician here, though the principle may equally apply)? What about when we give up looking out for ourselves first and our own interests first and finally sacrifice everything we have for the benefit of someone else? Let's talk about risk! And what exactly are we afraid of? Well... need I really say?
I realized the other day that the thing I'm most afraid of happening to me is the very thing I'm most often guilty of doing or being. It is that great "inadequacy" all of us face eventually if we stare long enough into that mirror. It is the exposure of true self and personal circumspection. Sometimes we cover all that up with makeup or some other disguise. Maybe a brash demeanor or an excessively quiet and reserved disposition or... maybe even "thrill" seeking? Either way... if we look long enough, we'll find that "thing" in all of us... and its fragile.
Maybe the greatest thrill is when we're willing to lay our lives out there and allow our greatest vulnerabilities to be realized and exposed. This is the place where speed can't move us away fast enough, climbing never takes us high enough out of its reach, diving is never deep enough to fully submerge from it... because we simply can't escape who we really are deep down inside.
So let me encourage you... take a couple extra moments and look into that mirror... step to the "edge" of you... and "go big, or don't go at all." You may be fragile like me, but the real adventure will have just begun!
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
Frogs, Part Deux
2:54am
It is not far too unusual to be awakened in the middle of the night (early morning). It has happened to me for years. As something almost like unto a spiritual ritual, at times I receive these "promptings" long before the sun rises from its transversed orbital slumber. It is a call to get out of bed and find the One thing calling me out of my sleepy state.
Far too often, I've been encountered in ways that are much more valuable than sleep, so when the prompting arises, I typically heed the call. This morning was no exception.
The apparent destination was the back patio. Didn't know why I was being called there in particular, but I was. Rain has been consistently falling since midnight, flashes of lightning and peels of thunder rolling in the distance. On the patio, things are peaceful and still. Seeing the evening's work of those pesky (and somewhat messy) spiders refracting light from a distant source. The frogs are quiet tonight. All is quite still save the droplets of rain falling gently all around.
You know when you have that feeling you're being watched? I've had that sensation several times through the years, especially in these earliest of morning calls... but typically the presence of the "watcher" is from somewhere "above." This morning, the watching didn't seem closer in proximity, just different in vantage point. This watcher was close and just behind me rather than from "above."
Pulling up a patio chair from the table and simply awaiting any word from my Inviter, I sat still, enjoying one of the coolest night's in many, many weeks. Several minutes passed... then tens of minutes... and still nothing. Being very aware of the presence of Senor Mosquito... as I am something akin to Filet Mignon to that member of the blood-sucking predator family... I was beginning to wonder about tonight's call.
Thinking a spot on the patio floor was another arachnid who had turned attention away from web building to human inspecting, I quickly went to turn on the patio light. Humorously finding the impending "spidy" to merely be a "spotty" on the patio floor, I turned to go flip the light back off. That's when the sense of my being watched became abundantly present to my awareness.
Enter "Kermit" the tree frog.
He'd been enjoying a "frog's eye view" of me since I arriving. There, suctioned onto the window just above my left shoulder, was the coolest looking guy... making his way toward one of those more juicy spiders (more power to him on that menu choice -- dine away, my friend -- one less for me to deal with!!!).
The view audience changing roles, he became the viewee now, while I the viewer.
What an amazing creature! How I wish I could just hang on a plane of glass by my toes (think of the party entertainment that would be!). Throat "clucking" about twice per second, eyes blinking, legs stretching while making his way higher up the glass (and closer to the eight-legged main course in this earliest of breakfasts). What an amazing creature!
Though he made no noise, was this my early morning caller? I sat and watched... wondered... what is the message, Sir? Perhaps none other than mutual appreciation and a sense that we're both being watched by One who is responsible for us both being here. Regardless of the hour, the condition of the weather, whether hungry or full... there is One who is always aware... always watching... always providing... always caring...
Regardless of the time of day or night... there is One who loves us all and He may even wake you up in the middle of the night, just to let you know. Just be watchful for the messenger.
You, my friend, are deeply loved, all the way down to your suction-cupped toes.
It is not far too unusual to be awakened in the middle of the night (early morning). It has happened to me for years. As something almost like unto a spiritual ritual, at times I receive these "promptings" long before the sun rises from its transversed orbital slumber. It is a call to get out of bed and find the One thing calling me out of my sleepy state.
Far too often, I've been encountered in ways that are much more valuable than sleep, so when the prompting arises, I typically heed the call. This morning was no exception.
The apparent destination was the back patio. Didn't know why I was being called there in particular, but I was. Rain has been consistently falling since midnight, flashes of lightning and peels of thunder rolling in the distance. On the patio, things are peaceful and still. Seeing the evening's work of those pesky (and somewhat messy) spiders refracting light from a distant source. The frogs are quiet tonight. All is quite still save the droplets of rain falling gently all around.
You know when you have that feeling you're being watched? I've had that sensation several times through the years, especially in these earliest of morning calls... but typically the presence of the "watcher" is from somewhere "above." This morning, the watching didn't seem closer in proximity, just different in vantage point. This watcher was close and just behind me rather than from "above."
Pulling up a patio chair from the table and simply awaiting any word from my Inviter, I sat still, enjoying one of the coolest night's in many, many weeks. Several minutes passed... then tens of minutes... and still nothing. Being very aware of the presence of Senor Mosquito... as I am something akin to Filet Mignon to that member of the blood-sucking predator family... I was beginning to wonder about tonight's call.
Thinking a spot on the patio floor was another arachnid who had turned attention away from web building to human inspecting, I quickly went to turn on the patio light. Humorously finding the impending "spidy" to merely be a "spotty" on the patio floor, I turned to go flip the light back off. That's when the sense of my being watched became abundantly present to my awareness.
Enter "Kermit" the tree frog.
He'd been enjoying a "frog's eye view" of me since I arriving. There, suctioned onto the window just above my left shoulder, was the coolest looking guy... making his way toward one of those more juicy spiders (more power to him on that menu choice -- dine away, my friend -- one less for me to deal with!!!).
The view audience changing roles, he became the viewee now, while I the viewer.
What an amazing creature! How I wish I could just hang on a plane of glass by my toes (think of the party entertainment that would be!). Throat "clucking" about twice per second, eyes blinking, legs stretching while making his way higher up the glass (and closer to the eight-legged main course in this earliest of breakfasts). What an amazing creature!
Though he made no noise, was this my early morning caller? I sat and watched... wondered... what is the message, Sir? Perhaps none other than mutual appreciation and a sense that we're both being watched by One who is responsible for us both being here. Regardless of the hour, the condition of the weather, whether hungry or full... there is One who is always aware... always watching... always providing... always caring...
Regardless of the time of day or night... there is One who loves us all and He may even wake you up in the middle of the night, just to let you know. Just be watchful for the messenger.
You, my friend, are deeply loved, all the way down to your suction-cupped toes.
Friday, August 15, 2008
Frog Praise
The rains have been heavy the past 24 hours or so and the frogs are singing a mighty chorus tonight.
The house where I live is situated in a place where we tend to have quite a few frogs during the spring and summer. The little critters have been especially plentiful this year, though we've not had a bunch of rain until the last couple of days. I am curious how these guys make it in the world. I far too frequently, for my comfort anyway (especially if I was one of them) find squashed and dried frog vestiges up and down our street. Not long ago, we had one smashed paper thin in our driveway and I began the inquiring as to which driver in our household was the accused. Turns out, it was a guest! Grace, extended.
I've always been a fan of frogs, though I've likely not been the best host to them. When I was a kid, growing up in Southern California, we had a significant population of really small frogs in our yard. I used to catch these little amphibians in pickle jars the Pop of the "mom and pop market" would give me (Midway Market was it's actual name... though I don't know from where-to-where it was midway) . I was careful to poke holes in the top of the jar and put stuff in there I thought the frogs would like to eat... a few ants, a piece of lettuce and whatever vegetables I thought I could coax off my dinner plate without my parents getting mad. Far too often, those little guys met the same fate as the old croaker in the driveway. I still mourn... slightly.
I've noticed the ones at my house now are a fairly stout breed. I was mowing a couple months ago and the grass was a bit higher than normal and I clipped one of my little friends (unwittingly, of course. I've made many a mowing detour to make peace with my four-legged friends). Everything was in tact in the palm-sized body, but there was a good gash on his head and the left "landing gear" was a bit afoul. Bummed... (I can't speak for how the frog felt, though I'm guessing no better than me), I helped him down to the pond. After the initial shock of getting whacked with a 21" Husqvarna 6.5 HP side-throw/mulcher, he was actually moving pretty good. I saw him to the waters edge and he (seemingly appreciatively) dove in. (I really hope it didn't sting too badly...).
Frogs, not the most beautiful dudes around (though allegedly finding company with a beautiful princess has dramatic affect) are nice to have around. The are great on fighting the insect pest population and have a great influence on a dog's saliva production when teased by the canine crowd (apparently no lasting problems here, but it's weird to watch your dog foam at the mouth for about 20 minutes after licking Mr. Toad -- great entertainment around our house, let me tell you).
The frog crowd doesn't always get the best press, either. Egypt, under Pharaoh, had a tough go of it with frogs when God chose to send a little message via the "rippit-ing" messengers. Eventually, Pharaoh summoned Moses to ask God to take the frogs away. Moses prayed and God relented... and a lot of frogs died that day, too (Exodus 8:1-15) and the smell was something to be reckoned with.
Tonight... they don't smell at my house. They are just croaking out a great symphony of frog noises. A while back, it was driving me a bit crazy hearing them every night and I've noticed they get even more actively loud after a good rain. So tonight it dawned on me that maybe that's when their most happy. Maybe after a good rain the bugs are plumper and their skin is a bit wetter and life is good in the pond! So... tonight I'm just a bit more at peace with the frogs... and now hearing their songs as a gesture of frog praise rather than an annoyance.
What nature sounds have you noticed lately? Want to share what you've heard?
We're listening... me and the frogs.
The house where I live is situated in a place where we tend to have quite a few frogs during the spring and summer. The little critters have been especially plentiful this year, though we've not had a bunch of rain until the last couple of days. I am curious how these guys make it in the world. I far too frequently, for my comfort anyway (especially if I was one of them) find squashed and dried frog vestiges up and down our street. Not long ago, we had one smashed paper thin in our driveway and I began the inquiring as to which driver in our household was the accused. Turns out, it was a guest! Grace, extended.
I've always been a fan of frogs, though I've likely not been the best host to them. When I was a kid, growing up in Southern California, we had a significant population of really small frogs in our yard. I used to catch these little amphibians in pickle jars the Pop of the "mom and pop market" would give me (Midway Market was it's actual name... though I don't know from where-to-where it was midway) . I was careful to poke holes in the top of the jar and put stuff in there I thought the frogs would like to eat... a few ants, a piece of lettuce and whatever vegetables I thought I could coax off my dinner plate without my parents getting mad. Far too often, those little guys met the same fate as the old croaker in the driveway. I still mourn... slightly.
I've noticed the ones at my house now are a fairly stout breed. I was mowing a couple months ago and the grass was a bit higher than normal and I clipped one of my little friends (unwittingly, of course. I've made many a mowing detour to make peace with my four-legged friends). Everything was in tact in the palm-sized body, but there was a good gash on his head and the left "landing gear" was a bit afoul. Bummed... (I can't speak for how the frog felt, though I'm guessing no better than me), I helped him down to the pond. After the initial shock of getting whacked with a 21" Husqvarna 6.5 HP side-throw/mulcher, he was actually moving pretty good. I saw him to the waters edge and he (seemingly appreciatively) dove in. (I really hope it didn't sting too badly...).
Frogs, not the most beautiful dudes around (though allegedly finding company with a beautiful princess has dramatic affect) are nice to have around. The are great on fighting the insect pest population and have a great influence on a dog's saliva production when teased by the canine crowd (apparently no lasting problems here, but it's weird to watch your dog foam at the mouth for about 20 minutes after licking Mr. Toad -- great entertainment around our house, let me tell you).
The frog crowd doesn't always get the best press, either. Egypt, under Pharaoh, had a tough go of it with frogs when God chose to send a little message via the "rippit-ing" messengers. Eventually, Pharaoh summoned Moses to ask God to take the frogs away. Moses prayed and God relented... and a lot of frogs died that day, too (Exodus 8:1-15) and the smell was something to be reckoned with.
Tonight... they don't smell at my house. They are just croaking out a great symphony of frog noises. A while back, it was driving me a bit crazy hearing them every night and I've noticed they get even more actively loud after a good rain. So tonight it dawned on me that maybe that's when their most happy. Maybe after a good rain the bugs are plumper and their skin is a bit wetter and life is good in the pond! So... tonight I'm just a bit more at peace with the frogs... and now hearing their songs as a gesture of frog praise rather than an annoyance.
What nature sounds have you noticed lately? Want to share what you've heard?
We're listening... me and the frogs.
Tuesday, August 05, 2008
Pace
Arrogance to my previous understanding once meant only calling excessive attention to one's self. Self aggrandizing speech and behaviors were easy marks to see arrogance in myself and in others around me. Outright bragging, brazen attention mongering, excessive vocalizations, "bling" demonstrations and label consciousness were all living proof of arrogance running a muck in my life. Strangely enough, even dashes of false humility pulled aggressively at my flimsy disguise attempting to shield pride and selfish motive from a discerning eye all to no avail.
Humility is rarely well impersonated.
Something about growing older and either admitting freely (or having it forced upon you) that you're "not all that" anymore (or perhaps never were) is a sobering road to what we can hope is eventually true and honest humility. There was something about Jesus that was simply and naturally "humble." Though He would have every reason to call attention to Himself, He didn't. He directed attention to others, their needs, their desires and He served others to perfection (see Philippians 2:1-11).
In time, the sincere Christ-follower can't escape this quality in Jesus and begins leaving behind the trappings of earthly attention grabbing. Taking credit for the successes, stepping to the front of attention, sitting in the seat of honor, warming to the sound of one's own name (or voice) being favorably spoken all eventually lose their alluring charm in the presence of Jesus. It perhaps becomes a little easier to give up the choicest morsels of life for the sake of others, too, eventually in time. But there are always alluring ways true humility eludes us. One such way has recently surfaced in my own quest to be more like Jesus.
Currently my life is running at an incredible pace. If I chose to do so, I could literally work 23 hours a day and would still have something left to do at the end of each day! Many others with whom I currently serve are in similar positions. We are all busy and working hard, for a cause in which we firmly believe and hold dear, and there always seems to be more we could be doing. Herein lies the challenge to true humility.
Having run several weeks now with little time taken to lap up some good personal nourishment from God's word and having spent few moments (let alone hours) in the kind of prayer that truly listens more than it speaks, it dawned on me just how arrogant I have been behaving! Continuing to run at this pace, without quietly being in the presence of God makes a gross assumption of pride and arrogance!
Now, I've not necessarily resorted back to the old behaviors of calling attention to myself (though I do believe those temptations are never really very far away from my potential) but I have fallen into a cyclical trap of behaving as if I can actually thrive and serve well without spending quiet, reflective, restorative time at the feet of the One whom self-defined humility (that would be, Jesus).
Thinking (or behaving) as if we can do "anything" on our own as a Christ-follower... is arrogant.
In John 15:5, Jesus said His followers can't do anything (really worth anything) apart from Him. So what is it inside of me that would behave as if I could? Especially when I know better...I can only conclude it to be arrogance.
Though Jesus had every reason (and perhaps every opportunity) to rely upon self-sufficiency, He didn't. Mark's gospel records that "very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed" (1:35). The text also records that Simon and his companions came looking for Jesus and told Him, "Everyone is looking for you!" And Jesus took off in another direction... (1:36-37).
If "everyone were looking for me" (and I was sure they weren't all out to get me) I'd probably run toward them and be pleased my company was so requested! There is something destructively attractive about being "in the middle of it all," isn't there? Even Jesus didn't stay "in the middle of it all" all the time. He was very conscious of the pace of life.
I have about concluded that "pace" in life can be an addictive agent. We arrogant types become quite enamored with ringing cell phones, pinging calendar warnings and the sound of our excuses for why we were "a little late" to our 2:00 meeting. Pace is addictive (especially rapid pace apparently is) and when we succumb to it, we are taking ourselves much too seriously.
Every time I don't take time for God...I am arrogant.
I'm trying to gain a new grip on this latest expression of arrogance in my life. More recently, I've been trying to equate time in God's Word and time in serious "listening" prayer as important (if not more so) as breathe and food (because likely they are).
In recent years I've learn how to "pick up the pace" on my life and now I'm trying to "find the grace" of "being still and knowing..." (Psalm 46:10) ... I'm not "all that"... never was... never will be.
And you?
Humility is rarely well impersonated.
Something about growing older and either admitting freely (or having it forced upon you) that you're "not all that" anymore (or perhaps never were) is a sobering road to what we can hope is eventually true and honest humility. There was something about Jesus that was simply and naturally "humble." Though He would have every reason to call attention to Himself, He didn't. He directed attention to others, their needs, their desires and He served others to perfection (see Philippians 2:1-11).
In time, the sincere Christ-follower can't escape this quality in Jesus and begins leaving behind the trappings of earthly attention grabbing. Taking credit for the successes, stepping to the front of attention, sitting in the seat of honor, warming to the sound of one's own name (or voice) being favorably spoken all eventually lose their alluring charm in the presence of Jesus. It perhaps becomes a little easier to give up the choicest morsels of life for the sake of others, too, eventually in time. But there are always alluring ways true humility eludes us. One such way has recently surfaced in my own quest to be more like Jesus.
Currently my life is running at an incredible pace. If I chose to do so, I could literally work 23 hours a day and would still have something left to do at the end of each day! Many others with whom I currently serve are in similar positions. We are all busy and working hard, for a cause in which we firmly believe and hold dear, and there always seems to be more we could be doing. Herein lies the challenge to true humility.
Having run several weeks now with little time taken to lap up some good personal nourishment from God's word and having spent few moments (let alone hours) in the kind of prayer that truly listens more than it speaks, it dawned on me just how arrogant I have been behaving! Continuing to run at this pace, without quietly being in the presence of God makes a gross assumption of pride and arrogance!
Now, I've not necessarily resorted back to the old behaviors of calling attention to myself (though I do believe those temptations are never really very far away from my potential) but I have fallen into a cyclical trap of behaving as if I can actually thrive and serve well without spending quiet, reflective, restorative time at the feet of the One whom self-defined humility (that would be, Jesus).
Thinking (or behaving) as if we can do "anything" on our own as a Christ-follower... is arrogant.
In John 15:5, Jesus said His followers can't do anything (really worth anything) apart from Him. So what is it inside of me that would behave as if I could? Especially when I know better...I can only conclude it to be arrogance.
Though Jesus had every reason (and perhaps every opportunity) to rely upon self-sufficiency, He didn't. Mark's gospel records that "very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed" (1:35). The text also records that Simon and his companions came looking for Jesus and told Him, "Everyone is looking for you!" And Jesus took off in another direction... (1:36-37).
If "everyone were looking for me" (and I was sure they weren't all out to get me) I'd probably run toward them and be pleased my company was so requested! There is something destructively attractive about being "in the middle of it all," isn't there? Even Jesus didn't stay "in the middle of it all" all the time. He was very conscious of the pace of life.
I have about concluded that "pace" in life can be an addictive agent. We arrogant types become quite enamored with ringing cell phones, pinging calendar warnings and the sound of our excuses for why we were "a little late" to our 2:00 meeting. Pace is addictive (especially rapid pace apparently is) and when we succumb to it, we are taking ourselves much too seriously.
Every time I don't take time for God...I am arrogant.
I'm trying to gain a new grip on this latest expression of arrogance in my life. More recently, I've been trying to equate time in God's Word and time in serious "listening" prayer as important (if not more so) as breathe and food (because likely they are).
In recent years I've learn how to "pick up the pace" on my life and now I'm trying to "find the grace" of "being still and knowing..." (Psalm 46:10) ... I'm not "all that"... never was... never will be.
And you?
Monday, July 28, 2008
Expect Delays
Have you noticed how often people tell you "the way its gonna be" and then it simply doesn't turn out that way?
The other night I was riding home from the office on the tollway I typically use to get home. I'm way past thinking about how much I pay in tolls each day to ride on that highway because the road surface is so superior to anything else in the area and being one of the least used roadways in northeast Dallas... it is worth every dime to me to enjoy it on a motorcycle! Anyway... the tollway features the kind of electronic roadway information signs that inform drivers of detours or delays. These are the same kind of signs that told Steve Martin's character in "L.A. Story" all about life and love. Anyway...
On the way home the other night I was traveling from much farther west than I normally do and I saw one of these signs that I typically don't see on my daily commute. On this day, the message informed all eastbound traffic to "Expect Delays Ahead."
As a motorcyclist, I appreciate any helpful information that can assist me in keeping the playing field "even" against the big "cages" (cars). Seeing the sign "Expect Delays Ahead," I backed off the throttle a bit and covered the brakes waiting for things to really bind up in traffic delays (accidents, unexpected road work, whatever...). Mile after mile proved not only to show no evidence of delays, but there wasn't even the slightest bit of slowing. Finally... after over half my commute was completed, I finally just "cracked" the throttle and let it fly completely unencumbered by traffic or delays!
So much for "intelligent" road signs!
Which reminds me of how many times I've heard people "tell me the way it's gonna be" with regard to particular situations and circumstances in life and as a result... I've eased off the throttle... covered the brakes... and then waited for the "worst" to come. I can't count how many times the prediction hasn't come true.
This happens all around us in life all the time... work, school, church, friends... have you ever noticed it? "We are never going to get this project in on time." "This test is going to be the worst ever! "This church is really gonna be in trouble now!" "I don't think our friendship can ever be the same again."
We've all heard it before, haven't we?
More often than not we choose to believe it, too. Sometimes we simply give too much credibility to the message because we assume the "source" can't be wrong. (In the Steve Martin movie, it wasn't anyway). Strangely enough, when things don't go as badly as everyone else said it would, we're surprised that things turned out as well as they did!
I wonder if there is another way?
Within reason (I'm not going to start blowing through red lights or anything...), I'm choosing more and more to assume the better and then be surprised if things don't go well. It seems inherently reasonable for Christ-followers to expect things to go well, even when things are rough or life takes an unpredictable turn for the worse. I think of some things Jesus said like, "I am with you always, even to the end of the age" (Matt. 28:20) or "You may ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it" (John 14:14) Or other scriptures that suggest things like God works for the good of those who love Him and have been called according to His good purpose (Romans 8:28).
So, the next time you see the signs that point to "delays ahead" what are you going to do?
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Objectification
I'm off to the gym in a few minutes... trying to get back into an abandoned fitness routine that though once had me in relatively good shape, but now has now left its weighty mark on my mid-section. Funny how age can catch you!
While I'm at the gym, I'm going to have my ear buds in listening to any number of artists in my "workout" playlist. That will take care of the auditory sensors available to me, but the "eyes" will still be available and Rob Bell has me thinking again about how subtle "lust" can be. I dove back into his book, Sex God (yes, the title is provocative) and he has again reminded me how brutally carnal we humans can be.
I'd like to think that with my thickening mid-section and not being the "body" I once was physically, that maybe, just maybe, I'm at least becoming more of the Christ-follower I long to be on the inside. But that is always up for grabs by our own assessments and by another's observation, I suppose. But for the past several years, I've really been working at seeing people with more righteous eyes.
Jesus talked about if a man even "looks at a woman lustfully" he has already committed adultery with her in his heart." Bell suggests that we are all "sexy" people because we long to be "connected" emotionally, spiritually (and physically) to the One who created us and, consequently, to each other. Of course, there are appropriate ways in which we are to be connected to one another, but when people "lust" and/or "act out" according to lust we circumvent the connectedness we are supposed to have for something much less. When we merely condesc
end to flesh, we are simply treating each other as nothing more than objects.A girl gets stares at the gym... shoot, a guy may get stares back... but what does that have to do with the "real" person inside? Objectification allows us to merely treat each other as objects rather than beautifully created beings... created in the image of God. And so much is lost in the process -- though our culture thinks it is all good and all gain.
Now... I've got my ear phones... but my eyes will be exposed. So, God, let me see all the people in the gym tonight with Your eyes... as real people... real beings... created in Your image... and may You glory in what You see!
Saturday, July 19, 2008
The Big of it All
Most people I know are basically goal oriented folks. We want a "win" and we want to know when we've "won" it. Now I don't know if that is simply the kinds of personalities I gravitate toward or what, but my hunch is that most of us live with some expectation of "life achievements" and realized "goals." It seems so common (at least to me) that we don't even give any alternative viewpoint much thought. Someone who isn't "goal oriented" is often considered "lazy" or "unmotivated."
Watch ESPN for more than 10 minutes and you'll see that "goal orientation" saturates the world of sports. "We can have a great season, but if we don't get to the championship game, does it really matter?" "So & So had a lifetime ERA of...." "If she wins this tournament, her name will be added to the list of greats!" The quotes run ad infinitum.
I've been wondering lat
ely if maybe goal orientation is a little "off-kilter" with God's way of looking at things. Studying the life of Abraham, I've always thought of him as "Father Abraham... from whom God's people come." That is ultimately what God promised him, but in this round of study recently, I've been considering more how he got there. Besides God's calling on his life, of course, what was it that really "drove" him to be the "great" Abraham? Belief comes into play as the New Testament recounts his life. Belief was credited as righteousness. But lately I've been thinking how that fits into the whole picture.
Like all of us, Abraham's life journey with God had it's "ups and downs." There were times Abraham chose wisely and waiting on God's plan and there were other times when he got out ahead of God and ill consequences followed. Which brings me to think of things a bit differently.
What if the really "big" part of life is in how we live the "little" things as opposed to being so set on the "big" things? Could we begin to see our lives as a series of "little" daily events of faithfulness, belief, obedience, trust, honesty, sincerity, etc.? What might be the result? Sometimes I get so fixated on the "big of it all" I miss the daily things that make me truly available (or not) for God's plan. Maybe the "little" things are really the "big" things and the "big" things are... just details?
It would perhaps make for boring television to see how great athletes got to where they are for the "big win" (hours of practice, study, diet, rest, etc.) but in a life journey with God, maybe that is precisely the point!
Your thoughts?
Watch ESPN for more than 10 minutes and you'll see that "goal orientation" saturates the world of sports. "We can have a great season, but if we don't get to the championship game, does it really matter?" "So & So had a lifetime ERA of...." "If she wins this tournament, her name will be added to the list of greats!" The quotes run ad infinitum.
I've been wondering lat
ely if maybe goal orientation is a little "off-kilter" with God's way of looking at things. Studying the life of Abraham, I've always thought of him as "Father Abraham... from whom God's people come." That is ultimately what God promised him, but in this round of study recently, I've been considering more how he got there. Besides God's calling on his life, of course, what was it that really "drove" him to be the "great" Abraham? Belief comes into play as the New Testament recounts his life. Belief was credited as righteousness. But lately I've been thinking how that fits into the whole picture.Like all of us, Abraham's life journey with God had it's "ups and downs." There were times Abraham chose wisely and waiting on God's plan and there were other times when he got out ahead of God and ill consequences followed. Which brings me to think of things a bit differently.
What if the really "big" part of life is in how we live the "little" things as opposed to being so set on the "big" things? Could we begin to see our lives as a series of "little" daily events of faithfulness, belief, obedience, trust, honesty, sincerity, etc.? What might be the result? Sometimes I get so fixated on the "big of it all" I miss the daily things that make me truly available (or not) for God's plan. Maybe the "little" things are really the "big" things and the "big" things are... just details?
It would perhaps make for boring television to see how great athletes got to where they are for the "big win" (hours of practice, study, diet, rest, etc.) but in a life journey with God, maybe that is precisely the point!
Your thoughts?
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Reflections
Raising kids is an amazing proposition. Generally we willfully step into these shoes, at times by accident and occasionally we walk in them by force. I've heard 80+ year old parents say of their 60+ year old children, "You're never done being a parent." How true that is!
Overall, partnering with my wife to raise our two daughters has been an amazingly joyful experience. People tell us we have great kids. We accept the compliment and whisper a prayer that people will always see our kids this way and that things will keep going well for us and for them. I remember my mother telling me with some frequency, "The way people see you is a reflection of how they see your father and me." That has always stuck with me. I believe it did leave me with a sense of preventative "guilt," but I guess it also somewhat guided my behavioral choices.
Recently, as my own kids navigate life and choices, I find another helpful angle of reflection. When my kids make hurtful choices, I have to deal with those choices as a parent and the reflection I'm concerned about in helping them is the reflection I see of the choices I made at their age staring back at me in their behavior now. Painfully staring right back at me, I might add.
At the time, I knew some of the choices I made as a kid hurt me when I chose them. I knew they hurt my parents when they found out about those choices (and perhaps they would have been hurt even more if they had found out about other choices). I realize some of my choices even
caused damage to how people saw me and my parents. But now, looking into my own kid's choices and seeing myself... that is a new level of hurt I've not experienced before. I find it fascinating that there is still pain associated with some of the choices I made growing up... a foggy, abstract mirrored reflection of the choices I made so long ago.
As parents, we protect our kids. Early on it is protection from dangers in the "outside world" and we protect from all the injuries that can be levied against them. As they grow a bit older, we guard ourselves as parents and hopefully protect them from our own neglect and missed parenting opportunities. But keeping them from hurting themselves at any age is down-right difficult, if not impossible.
I remember teaching both my kids how to ride a bike. Walking behind with my hand on the seat... then running along side... then letting go... then running closely behind... then standing and then finally, only watching from a distance (this is why bicycle training is meant for younger parents, I'm convinced!)... it was inevitable they would eventually fall, scrape a knee and come crying for Mommy and Daddy. And they did.
Teenage scrapes, adult child falls... don't necessarily show up on the surface. Sometimes the injuries are really deep and take a while to surface. When they do... reflection may be the best cure for the pain.
I find letting my own self-inflicted pain and the pain it caused others come back to the surface may be a suitable salve for aiding the hurts and pains of my own growing kids as their choices hurt themselves and others. It is reflection of a different kind. Letting the pain come back to the surface helps me see redemption from a new point of view. It allows me to at least see some good come from what was once so painfully bad.
Life gets messy... sometimes we get hurt (and we certainly hurt others) living it. But when the pain of the past potentially offers healing for the present, that may be a reflection worth making.
Your thoughts?
Overall, partnering with my wife to raise our two daughters has been an amazingly joyful experience. People tell us we have great kids. We accept the compliment and whisper a prayer that people will always see our kids this way and that things will keep going well for us and for them. I remember my mother telling me with some frequency, "The way people see you is a reflection of how they see your father and me." That has always stuck with me. I believe it did leave me with a sense of preventative "guilt," but I guess it also somewhat guided my behavioral choices.
Recently, as my own kids navigate life and choices, I find another helpful angle of reflection. When my kids make hurtful choices, I have to deal with those choices as a parent and the reflection I'm concerned about in helping them is the reflection I see of the choices I made at their age staring back at me in their behavior now. Painfully staring right back at me, I might add.
At the time, I knew some of the choices I made as a kid hurt me when I chose them. I knew they hurt my parents when they found out about those choices (and perhaps they would have been hurt even more if they had found out about other choices). I realize some of my choices even
caused damage to how people saw me and my parents. But now, looking into my own kid's choices and seeing myself... that is a new level of hurt I've not experienced before. I find it fascinating that there is still pain associated with some of the choices I made growing up... a foggy, abstract mirrored reflection of the choices I made so long ago.As parents, we protect our kids. Early on it is protection from dangers in the "outside world" and we protect from all the injuries that can be levied against them. As they grow a bit older, we guard ourselves as parents and hopefully protect them from our own neglect and missed parenting opportunities. But keeping them from hurting themselves at any age is down-right difficult, if not impossible.
I remember teaching both my kids how to ride a bike. Walking behind with my hand on the seat... then running along side... then letting go... then running closely behind... then standing and then finally, only watching from a distance (this is why bicycle training is meant for younger parents, I'm convinced!)... it was inevitable they would eventually fall, scrape a knee and come crying for Mommy and Daddy. And they did.
Teenage scrapes, adult child falls... don't necessarily show up on the surface. Sometimes the injuries are really deep and take a while to surface. When they do... reflection may be the best cure for the pain.
I find letting my own self-inflicted pain and the pain it caused others come back to the surface may be a suitable salve for aiding the hurts and pains of my own growing kids as their choices hurt themselves and others. It is reflection of a different kind. Letting the pain come back to the surface helps me see redemption from a new point of view. It allows me to at least see some good come from what was once so painfully bad.
Life gets messy... sometimes we get hurt (and we certainly hurt others) living it. But when the pain of the past potentially offers healing for the present, that may be a reflection worth making.
Your thoughts?
Wednesday, July 09, 2008
Potential
It's late, I'm tired and I'm also so wired there is no way I'm going to find sleep anytime soon. I get this way at least once per week, especially after teaching or facilitating a group of Christ followers. There is something about the energy both expended and received in those contexts that stirs one's soul making the body hard to sedate and the mind difficult to rest.
Tonight, the "buzz" is more a product of having spent 5 hours with a truly amazing group of people. Male, female, relatively old and relatively young, assorted degrees of education and a bunch of life experience thrown in for good measure... we all engaged in something that is truly fascinating: potential.
As cursed as it is blessed, "potential" is one of the most amazing things I can think of. Back in the late 70's, I sketched a design idea on a cocktail napkin and showed it to a professional friend. His comment as he gazed at my sketch was something along the lines of, "Wow, that has a lot of potential!" Full of the sounds of "potential," I walked out of the restaurant feeling pretty good about my idea. I left the napkin on the table.
I never did anything with the idea. About two years later, I saw my idea roll down a street. A guy named Phil Baechler had developed the "Jogging Stroller" and within a few months of his prototype, the idea of a jogging stroller was everywhere! Potential? Yeah, I guess!
Now, I don't suggest that I was the first to ever venture onto that idea, nor do I pretend to think that someone found that napkin sketch of mine and made something of it. That would be a bit too self-assuming. Instead, my issue is with the whole concept of "potential." How many great ideas, sketches, concepts, paradigms have had great "potential" but never "got off the cocktail table" because of the limitation of the humans involved? Either an individual's lack of will or drive to execute the tasks necessary to reach the realization of potential or a group's inability to build enough community and cooperation within itself to get the job done, has likely been the bane of a bunch of "potential."
We live in an amazing age. This laptop I'm using is a contemporary icon of "potential" fulfilled (and continuing to be fulfilled, I might add). Quite likely, as I write these words there is some "techno-genius" lying awake in bed - or sitting at her desk in these wee hours of the morning swimming in the wispy thoughts of the potential of her idea as she tries to figure out a way to "make it happen."
In Genesis 11, laptop "potential" took the form of a tall tower made of bricks baked to a new level of firmness (instead of stones) with tar (instead of mortar). I'm guessing this new design had significant potential because the Lord chose to confuse the common language of the people doing the building because this was "only the beginning of what they will do. They will be able to do anything they want" (11:6).
Tonight, I met with a group of people whose talents and individual gifts are impressive. Some possess qualities that are truly remarkable. And together, tonight we began looking at the "bricks" and the "microchips" that could be the very building blocks of something with more potential than any of us have ever experienced before. Oh... the potential!
While all that potential was being expressed, we also had to lament some of the lost potential we've all experienced along the way. Many, if not all of us in the room, owned varying levels of lost potential. Some were ideas that never made it off the table top, others were moments of responsibility lost and confessions of neglect. The weight of the moment was palpable, uncomfortable and both corporately and individually indicting...and yet... right there in the middle of it all... there was this thing called "potential"... hovering like the nexus of new things to come.
What will take this group to another level? We all took comfort in something that is eternally true: "God can do anything" (Luke 1:37). Now that, has potential!
What potential are you waiting to experience? How might God fit into that plan? Does it help you to know "God can do anything?"
Tonight, the "buzz" is more a product of having spent 5 hours with a truly amazing group of people. Male, female, relatively old and relatively young, assorted degrees of education and a bunch of life experience thrown in for good measure... we all engaged in something that is truly fascinating: potential.
As cursed as it is blessed, "potential" is one of the most amazing things I can think of. Back in the late 70's, I sketched a design idea on a cocktail napkin and showed it to a professional friend. His comment as he gazed at my sketch was something along the lines of, "Wow, that has a lot of potential!" Full of the sounds of "potential," I walked out of the restaurant feeling pretty good about my idea. I left the napkin on the table.
I never did anything with the idea. About two years later, I saw my idea roll down a street. A guy named Phil Baechler had developed the "Jogging Stroller" and within a few months of his prototype, the idea of a jogging stroller was everywhere! Potential? Yeah, I guess!
Now, I don't suggest that I was the first to ever venture onto that idea, nor do I pretend to think that someone found that napkin sketch of mine and made something of it. That would be a bit too self-assuming. Instead, my issue is with the whole concept of "potential." How many great ideas, sketches, concepts, paradigms have had great "potential" but never "got off the cocktail table" because of the limitation of the humans involved? Either an individual's lack of will or drive to execute the tasks necessary to reach the realization of potential or a group's inability to build enough community and cooperation within itself to get the job done, has likely been the bane of a bunch of "potential."
We live in an amazing age. This laptop I'm using is a contemporary icon of "potential" fulfilled (and continuing to be fulfilled, I might add). Quite likely, as I write these words there is some "techno-genius" lying awake in bed - or sitting at her desk in these wee hours of the morning swimming in the wispy thoughts of the potential of her idea as she tries to figure out a way to "make it happen."
In Genesis 11, laptop "potential" took the form of a tall tower made of bricks baked to a new level of firmness (instead of stones) with tar (instead of mortar). I'm guessing this new design had significant potential because the Lord chose to confuse the common language of the people doing the building because this was "only the beginning of what they will do. They will be able to do anything they want" (11:6).
Tonight, I met with a group of people whose talents and individual gifts are impressive. Some possess qualities that are truly remarkable. And together, tonight we began looking at the "bricks" and the "microchips" that could be the very building blocks of something with more potential than any of us have ever experienced before. Oh... the potential!
While all that potential was being expressed, we also had to lament some of the lost potential we've all experienced along the way. Many, if not all of us in the room, owned varying levels of lost potential. Some were ideas that never made it off the table top, others were moments of responsibility lost and confessions of neglect. The weight of the moment was palpable, uncomfortable and both corporately and individually indicting...and yet... right there in the middle of it all... there was this thing called "potential"... hovering like the nexus of new things to come.
What will take this group to another level? We all took comfort in something that is eternally true: "God can do anything" (Luke 1:37). Now that, has potential!
What potential are you waiting to experience? How might God fit into that plan? Does it help you to know "God can do anything?"
Tuesday, July 01, 2008
Adopted
Sitting around a friend's pool one Sunday evening not too long ago, my wife noticed something moving from under our friend's back fence. Seconds later, a little black puppy dog nose reappeared and poked its way further under the fence. Knowing my friend's garage was open and the side door to the backyard also standing wide open, I whistled out to the "little black nose."
Almost instantly, as if she'd done it a thousand times, a little dog came trotting across the pool deck with a rather desperate and dismayed look on her face. She was just a tiny little thing possibly no more than 6 months old. As I sat in my chair reading the Rolling Stone article on The Eagles comeback tour, the little dog made her way over to me first placing her right front paw on my leg. Instinctively, I reached down, picked up the toothpick thin bodied dog and placed her in my lap. I kept reading...Within seconds she was asleep, but I was beginning to get strong whiffs of this little canine urchin. Clearly she had never been combed, let alone groomed. By the looks of her face, I was guessing a breeding of Bichon Frise with possibly an ounce of Poodle. Her face was sweet, but her hair rivaled the likes of any dreadlocks I'd ever seen! She smelled of things so foul I won't write of them here... but within a couple minutes, she was fast asleep in my lap.
When it was time for grilling some meat, I sat her down on the ground and she and our friend's dog got along quite nicely. After eating a great meal together, my friend's wife asked, "What are you going to do with this dog?" The first thing I thought was to give her a bath. When done with that she smelled all the better, her hair was all the worse! Next she suggested, "Why don't you try grooming her?" And the fun began...
Valium could not have given this dog a better sense of calm. Standing on the picnic table for nearly 3 hours, this little puppy let me cut all her matted hair off her snip by snip until only her face was left to be tended. She didn't look like much (I'd never cut anyone's hair before, let alone a dog's), but she looked a lot better. Then came the pivotal question... "What next?" my friends asked.
My wife is normally a big dog lover... but for some reason this time she was running the other way! But by now, this puppy wasn't moving from my side. As if she'd taken out an ad on Ownerfinder.com, this puppy had found her match! Forget the video interviews, phone messages or a first date... she was ready to move in!
Long story short, we took her home, named her "Chloe" and now you'd think she owns the joint! She's been with us for seven weeks now and it feels like she's always been around. Constantly vying for a dominant position among the other animals (another Bichon and a Manx cat named "Tiger"). She approaches any human being who sits still for more than 2 minutes, she has
become a joy (and a minor pain) to the Greenhouse.We looked for "Lost & Found" signs and none ever appeared. We had her professionally groomed and now, if she ever even had original owners, they'd never recognize her. She's put on about 1.5 pounds (which is a bunch when you only weigh 7 pounds) and is beginning to act less and less like a puppy. No doubt, she has found a home and we've found a new addition to our family
I think there is a blog "lesson" in there somewhere... Sometimes we get abused, neglected or left to ourselves. And the evil one doesn't care much if we run free, get dirty, injured or just plain die. But then Jesus takes us in... pulls off the ticks (so to speak)... cleans us up (spiritually washed in His blood)... grooms us after His nature (much better than I did with a pair of scissors)... and gives us a good home, a good name, and a life filled with love.
Chole has had a few "accidents" around the house since we've taken her in. She's adopted her former pattern of behavior on a few occasions and bolted down the street through a neglected front door. She pesters the longtime canine resident Max (an 8-year-old Bichon) to no end and makes the cat mad more often than not... but she's also fun to watch run across the yard, she tilts her head in that innocent way little puppies do as if they are trying to figure something out for the first time, she's cuddles like no other dog we've ever shared life with, and makes our whole home a more interesting place to live.
I've found myself wondering... isn't this story familiar?What do you think?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
