In just a few hours, I will be humbled to stand before a room full of people and attempt to bring a word on behalf of Jesus. It is now late into the evening (actually, early into the morning), I've just put the finishing touches to the week's outline and powerpoint slides... and I wait. The "wait" is always a bit difficult for me...
The message begins to churn early, as soon as the occasion to speak presents itself. Text, then angle, then details... but there is little stress there. That is part of the creative nature of the task of preaching and even when writer's block sets in and you don't feel like it will ever come together, it always seems to gel. A gracious work of the Holy Spirit, I've always felt.
For me, the wait is difficult because I realize how unworthy I am to speak. I feel the weight of a mortal man presenting an immortal message. I fog the mirror of self-reflection everytime I step near it. My breath is heavy... the wait continues.
Preaching is a sacred trust which though it may get easier homiletically (presenting it) it only seems to get more difficult spiritually. Can I really live up to this message I will bring? Does my life reflect any of the Light of which I speak? The message is sacred, the messenger is not -- that is truth as much as the Truth proclaimed is Truth.
The only credible witness I bring to this task is that God is merciful and kind. He is gracious to allow a human mouth to even speak His name. His is patient, forgiving and longsuffering when we have trouble living it out. He is compassionate and kind to open the ears of the listener to hear past our mistakes and misgivings. How comical, in a way, it is to speak on behalf of God... and yet, so profoundly good when blessed to do so.
"Lord, please speak through me in such a way as that I not be heard, but that You be heard. Decrease my presence, that Yours may increase. Open the ear and heart of the listener and change our lives, forever more. Glory be to God in the Highest."
Sacred trust, indeed.
3 comments:
So, how did it go?
Hi Christopher,
What an awesome way to present God's Word. I have always known you have His spirit within you and we sorely miss having you here in Arizona. I am greatly rejoiced knowing that God has found a place for you and that He is still using you to share His Holy Word. Let it always be that folks do hear Him and not you. But He has used you in that capacity many times.
May He continue to bless you and your family in reaching those who need His salvation.
In Christ,
Diana Clarkson
So, how did it go?
That is a good question... because on occasions I've thought I've failed, later someone has indicated they were blessed by the message. I wonder if the converse might be true? When I think things have gone well... perhaps there is just too much of "me" left in the equation?
I wonder how Peter felt at Pentecost? Did he ask his wife when he got home?
To answer the question... I was satisfied. I hope and pray God was as well.
Thanks for asking.
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